Indlela yokubeka imida enempilo kubudlelwane bakho kunye nokuphucula impilo-ntle yakho

Ngaba uziva udiniwe bubudlelwane apho unikela ngaphezu kokuba ufumana? Ngaba ukufumanisa kunzima ukuthi “hayi” kwaye ekugqibeleni uqokelele uxinzelelo o inzondo? Misela imida Sisakhono esibalulekileyo sokugcina ubudlelwane obunempilo kunye nokukhusela bethu impilo-ntle ngokweemvakalelo.

Ukufunda ukubeka imida akuphuculi nje ukunxibelelana kwethu nabanye, kodwa komeleza nathi ukuzithemba yaye isinceda siphile ngendlela elungeleleneyo. Nantsi indlela yokuchonga, ukunxibelelana, kunye nokugcina imida esempilweni kubudlelwane bakho bobuqu kunye nobungcali.

Yeyiphi imida kubudlelwane kwaye ibaluleke ngantoni?

Los imida kubudlelwane Yimithetho yobuqu esiyimiselayo ukuchaza ukuba sizimisele kangakanani ukuya kunxibelelwano lwethu nabanye. Bamele indlela enempilo yokukhusela iimvakalelo zethu, ixesha kunye intlalontle jikelele.

Xa singabeki imida ecacileyo, sisengozini yokuziva sixhatshaziwe, sidiniwe, okanye sisetyenziswa kakubi. Endaweni yoko, ngokuzichaza ngokufanelekileyo, sifumana:

• Khusela wethu Ubume kunye nokuzimela.
• Kuphephe intukuthelo kunye nokukhathazeka.
• Phucula i unxibelelwano kunye nokuhloniphana.
• Ukunciphisa i uxinzelelo kunye nexhala.
• Ukukhuthaza ubudlelwane obulungeleleneyo nobanelisayo.

Iintlobo zemida kubudlelwane

Ayiyiyo yonke imida elinganayo. Kuxhomekeke kuhlobo lobudlelwane kunye ne iimfuno zomntu ngamnye, sinokwahlula iindidi ezininzi zemida:

imida ngokweemvakalelo

Le mida ikhusela iimvakalelo zethu kwaye isinceda ukuba silawule ubudlelwane bethu ngaphandle kokuziva sidiniwe. Kuthetha ukwazi ixesha lokubandakanyeka kunye nexesha lokubuyela umva ukukhusela zethu intlalontle.

Imida ngokwasemzimbeni

Bachaza yethu indawo yam kunye noqhagamshelwano lomzimba olukhululekileyo kuthi. Abanye abantu bathanda ukunxibelelana rhoqo, ngelixa abanye bekhetha ukugcina ezinye umgama.

Imida yobukrelekrele

Ngokunxulumene neengcinga kunye neenkolelo zethu, le mida ithetha intlonipho yethu izimvo kunye nokukwazi ukuxoxa ngaphandle kokuhlaselwa komntu.

Ixesha elimiselweyo

Babhekisa kwindlela esilawula ngayo wethu ixesha kwaye siqinisekise ukuba asisoloko sifumaneka kwabanye nto leyo eyingozi kwiimfuno zethu.

Imida yentlalontle

Balawula unxibelelwano lwethu kunye bahlobo, intsapho kunye nabo sisebenza nabo, siqinisekisa ukuba sinolungelelwano phakathi kokuhlalisana kunye nokuba nexesha lethu.

Indlela yokuchonga ukungabikho kwemida

Ukuba awuqinisekanga nokuba ufuna ukumisela imida ecacileyo kubudlelwane bakho, jonga ukuba kukho naziphi na ezi mpawu zisebenzayo kuwe:

• Unzima ukuthi "hayi" kwaye ugqibe ukwenza izinto ongafuni ukuzenza.
• Uziva udiniwe emva kokunxibelelana nabantu abathile.
• Bayakuhlasela iimvakalelo zokucaphuka okanye ukudandatheka.
• Uyabavumela abanye ukuba bakuthathele izigqibo ngaphandle kokuvakalisa uluvo lwakho.
• Uphepha ukungquzulana ngazo zonke iindleko, nokuba kukuxabisa impilo-ntle yakho.

Ukuba uchonga nayiphi na kwezi ngongoma, lixesha lokuba uqale ukusebenza ekudaleni imida esempilweni ebomini bakho.

Ubuchule bokumisela imida esempilweni

1. Chonga into ekukhathazayo

Ngaphambi kokuba ubeke imida, kubalulekile Chonga ukuba zeziphi iimeko ezikwenza uzive ungakhululekanga kwaye nangaliphi na ixesha ovakalelwa kukuba bahamba kakhulu.

2. Funda ukuthi “hayi”

Ukuthi “hayi” akukwenzi ube ngumntu ombi. Yi sixhobo kubalulekile ekubekeni imida kunye nokuzihlonipha. Ziqhelanise namabinzana afana nala:

• "Uxolo, kodwa andikwazi ukunceda ngaloo nto okwangoku."
• "Ndiyalubulela uluvo lwakho, kodwa ndikhetha ukuyenza ngolu hlobo."

3. Sebenzisa unxibelelwano oluqinisekileyo

Veza imida yakho ngokucacileyo nangokuzolileyo. Sebenzisa iingxelo zomntu wokuqala ukukhusela omnye umntu ukuba angayithathi njengohlaselo, njengale:

• “Ndiziva ndingakhululekanga xa kusenzeka oku. Ndinqwenela ukuba siyenze ngokwahlukileyo.”

4. Hlala uqinile kodwa ube bhetyebhetye

Abanye abantu banokusabela kakubi kwimida yakho emitsha. Ibalulekile yimani niqinile, kodwa ube bhetyebhetye xa kuyimfuneko.

5. Vavanya ubudlelwane obuyityhefu

Ukuba umntu uhlala engayinanzi okanye engayihloneli imida yakho, kusenokuba lixesha lokuphinda ucinge ngobo budlelwane.

Iingenelo zokubeka imida

Xa ufunda ukumisela imida enempilo, uya kuqaphela uphuculo olukhulu kwintlalontle yakho kunye kumgangatho wobudlelwane bakho bobuqu kunye nobungcali. Ezinye izibonelelo ziquka:

• Mkhulu ukuzithemba kwaye uthembele kuwe.
• Ulwalamano olulungeleleneyo ngakumbi olusekelwe kwintlonipho.
• ukuncitshiswa kwe uxhalaba noxinzelelo.
• Ixesha elingakumbi namandla okunikela kwizinto ezibalulekileyo kuwe.

Ukufunda ukuseta imida enempilo kubudlelwane bakho sisakhono esinamandla esiya kuguqula impilo-ntle yakho kunye nomgangatho wonxibelelwano lwakho nabanye. Okukhona uzihlonela kwaye ukhusele indawo yakho, kokukhona uya kutsala ubudlelwane obuxabisa kwaye uhloniphe loo mida. Qala ukuzilolonga namhlanje kwaye uphucule umgangatho wobomi bakho!